ANXIETY and STRESS
Here are some self-coping statements to use in order to combat anxiety and stress, which will allow you to stay focused on the “here and now” (today) rather than be distracted by the “there and then” (yesterday)
1.It helps concentrate your thoughts on what you do in the present.
2.It takes attention away from possible and numerous disasters, which could (maybe) happen in the future.
3.It encourages you to think rationally through difficult situations.
Here are some examples of self coping statements, feel free to use them or adapt them to your needs.
BEFORE THE EVENT... that causes you to feel anxious:
“ I can only do one thing at a time, I’ll concentrate on one thing, then move on to the next thing.
“What is it I have to do right now?”
“I will survive this, I have in the past, and so have others.”
“I’ll probably look back afterwards, and think what the hell was I worrying about”
They can’t sack me (or kick me out) if I get it wrong, so what the hell!”
“ I won’t even remember this in two hours time”
“There are other opportunities to do this later, I don’t have to do it now”
DURING THE EVENT ... if you have to go ahead
“What do I need to do first, what do I need to do next?”
·“Don’t think about what other things, that’s not relevant, I’m doing alright as I am”
·“One step at a time!”
·“Never mind what others might be think, its not relevant.”
If you find yourself beginning to panic, remember
WASP....WAIT…ATTEND…SLOWLY.... PROCEED...... and the panic will subside, without doubt!
Whatever you do, don’t think the panic will be eliminated, instead, what this will do is keep it manageable, so you can carry on doing what you need to do.
Don't know any relaxation exercises? Scroll down the page to read a version on how to relax.
Keep yourself emotionally occupied, thinking about 'it' will increase the fear and worry, making you feel worse, so stop 'it'.
The worst thing that could possibly happen is that you fail this time, but you are allowed to make mistakes, as long as you learn from them.
AFTER THE EVENT.....that you thought you could never do;
Say out loud
“I did it!”
“Congratulate yourself, give yourself a treat, anything!”
“It wasn’t that bad was it, I made it”
"It wasn’t as good, but I did it”
"I felt uncomfortable, but I coped”
“Its just negative thoughts, that’s the problem, when I control them I can control the irrational fears!”
“Next time, it wont be as bad.”
“Its pointless thinking about it now, its over and done with!”
1.Reframe the “problem”, start by changing its name, call it a challenge, it makes everything seem that much more achievable.
2.Take control of the situation, even if out of control.
3.Withdraw for the situation, even if only temporarily.
4.Displace the anxiety onto physical activity.
5.Find emotional support to cope with the feelings, if you need to
MOST STRESS/ANXIETY IS SELF-INFLICTED BY;
1.Our inability to say “NO”
2.Our unrealistic expectations of others and ourselves.
3.Our unrealistic demands on ourselves.
4.Our irrational belief that we should never make mistakes.
5.Believing that we are indispensable.
Use this technique to lower your arousal to panic, bringing it back to a manageable level.
Make sure you do this before it gets out of hand, so that means learning off by rote, so you remember it if you need it at any time
1.Say to yourself, (ALOUD if the situation allows) “STOP”
This means STOP fussing, STOP worrying, STOP getting worked up!
2.Breathe in and hold your breath for a MOMENT.
3.Breathe out SLOWLY, relaxing your shoulders and hands.
4.Pause for a moment, then breathe in again
5.Breathe out SLOWLY again, this time relaxing your forehead and jaw.
6.Stay quiet for a few seconds, and then go on with whatever you were doing, moving slowly and smoothly.
7.If you have to speak to anyone, take a deep breath, speak slower, with your voice a little lower than usual, so they have to listen to you speak, which helps take them away from seeing that you were beginning to panic.
This STOP technique can be done without anyone noticing, and you will feel the tension lessen to a controllable level.
YOU can stop the anxiety happening again, its not easy, but you can do it, after all, it was just a bad habit, and by working on it, you can break it.